February 28, 2015

My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash.

- Henny Youngman

February 27, 2015

Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.

- Walter Winchell

Meg & Greg

February 26, 2015

His venture sounds like a banana peel awaiting its victim.

- Charlotte Curtis

February 25, 2015

Filming takes a lot out of you. It really does. It's immensely demanding, and you have to put the rest of your life in the icebox until you do your final shot.

- John Cleese

February 24, 2015

If you're lucky enough to do well, it's your responsibility to send the elevator back down.

- Kevin Spacey

February 23, 2015

Don't compare yourself with someone else's version of happy or thin. Accepting yourself burns the most calories.

- Caroline Rhea

February 22, 2015

Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice.

- Robert Frost

February 21, 2015

You know when you have found your prince because you not only have a smile on your face, but in your heart as well.

- Author Unknown

February 20, 2015

It is with the approach of winter that cats...wear their richest fur and assume an air of sumptuous and delightful opulence.

- Pierre Loti

February 19, 2015

I used to think that cyberspace was fifty years away. What I thought was fifty years away, was only ten years away. And what I thought was ten years away... it was already here. I just wasn't aware of it yet.

- Bruce Sterling

February 18, 2015

Always keep that happy attitude. Pretend that you are holding a beautiful fragrant bouquet.

- Earl Nightingale

February 17, 2015

If we had great distant vision like a hawk we could avoid most disasters, altering our future.

- Unknown Author

February 16, 2015

All life demands struggle. Those who have everything given to them become lazy, selfish, and insensitive to the real values of life. The very striving and hard work that we so constantly try to avoid is the major building block in the person we are today.

- Pope Paul VI

February 15, 2015

And finally Winter, with its bitin', whinin' wind, and all the land will be mantled with snow.

- Roy Bean

February 14, 2015

There are always flowers for those who want to see them.

- Henri Matisse

February 13, 2015

Advice from an Icicle
Keep Your Cool
Be Clear
Don't Be a Drip
Know When to Chill
Spend Time Just Hanging Out
Avoid Meltdowns
Get to the Point!

- Ilan Shamir

February 12, 2015

Wherever I go, I'm watching. Even on vacation, when I'm in an airport or a railroad station, I look around, snap pictures, and find out how people do things.

- Richard Scarry

February 11, 2015

Challenge yourself, go for it whatever "it" may be; we are much more powerful and capable than we will ever know.

- Amy Purdy

February 10, 2015

The aim of art is to represent not the outward appearance of things, but their inward significance.

- Aristotle

February 09, 2015

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute.

- Jessica Savitch

February 08, 2015

The minute I get into a hotel room, I scatter my stuff everywhere. It's like a bomb site within a minute. So I suppose that means I'm trying to nest.

- Carey Mulligan

February 07, 2015

Why this car is automatic
It's systematic
It's hydromatic
Why it's grease lightning.

- Grease Lightning

February 06, 2015

Jesus Christ! I'm sorry. I had a bite of my bagel and I forgot to pray.

Dear Jesus, please forgive me for not praying before I had a bite of my bagel and schmeer.

Thank you very much. Amen.

- Miss Congeniality

February 05, 2015

The purpose of learning is growth, and our minds, unlike our bodies, can continue growing as we continue to live.

- Mortimer Adler

February 04, 2015

When you hold your baby in your arms the first time, and you think of all the things you can say and do to influence him, it's a tremendous responsibility. What you do with him can influence not only him, but everyone he meets and not for a day or a month or a year but for time and eternity.

- Rose Kennedy

February 03, 2015

Technology is so much fun but we can drown in our technology. The fog of information can drive out knowledge.

- Daniel J. Boorstin

February 02, 2015

Winter is nature’s way of saying, "Up yours."

- Robert Byrne

February 01, 2015

I think people really appreciate clever commercials, as do I. I think they're very entertaining. You just have to wade through all the garbage. That's one of the reasons people watch the Super Bowl. A lot of them watch it to see the commercials and not the actual game.

- Kevin Nealon